


it's Murder time and everything's chaos

by SJAandDWfan



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gen, inspired by a tumblr post, murder game au, nobody dies it's fine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 21:14:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7377673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SJAandDWfan/pseuds/SJAandDWfan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>College AU based on the tumblr post about a college game named 'Murder'.</p><p>Waverly was just about to leave for her early morning Latin class when she noticed two white plastic utensils on the floor. Sighing, she bent to pick them up and resigned herself to the fact that, once again, it was Murder time at the University of Purgatory. Waverly’s heart stuttered as she read the second name.</p><p>Charming and sweet, but able to hold her own against Wynonna’s sass, Nicole was the reason that Waverly had first started questioning how straight she really was. Biting her lip, Waverly checked over her shoulder to make sure Chrissy was still asleep before putting the knife with Bobo’s name back on the floor and tucking the one bearing Nicole’s name carefully into her pocket.</p><p>or</p><p>Waverly and Nicole totally like each other, Dolls thinks he's a super spy, Doc doesn't know what he's doing, Chrissy is WayHaught's biggest shipper and Wynonna is an oblivious shit-ticket who takes this game way too seriously.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it's Murder time and everything's chaos

**Author's Note:**

> This is the post this work is based on: http://alloverthegaf.tumblr.com/post/142219232256/alloverthegaf-its-murder-time-at-college-so

It was a Tuesday morning when the knives were slipped under her door.

Waverly was just about to leave for her early morning Latin class when she noticed two white plastic utensils on the floor. Sighing, she bent to pick them up and resigned herself to the fact that, once again, it was Murder time at the University of Purgatory.

‘Murder’ was a game that was played annually amongst the student body, wherein a plastic knife with the name of your target was slipped under your door, and then you had to find that person and touch them with the knife to ‘kill’ them. Once you had killed your target, you collected any names they hadn’t ‘killed’ and those people then became your next targets and so on until one person remained.

It was a childish game, and could take weeks to reach its end, even with the relatively small student population. The prize wasn’t even that good; Waverly was pretty sure it was just a bottle of vodka. This being her Sophomore year at college, she had already played Murder once before. It was a total embarrassment in which she had lasted six hours before falling victim to her older sister Willa. She didn’t even see her target.

She examined the names on the knives. She knew one was meant for her and one for her roommate Chrissy, but seeing as Chrissy was still sound asleep, it meant Waverly had the choice of which name she picked. One knife read _Bobo del Rey_ , and the other read _Nicole Haught_. Waverly’s heart stuttered as she read the second name. Although she knew both names, her opinion on them differed greatly. Whereas Bobo del Rey was nothing more than a creepy Senior with a very particular dress sense who had a strange fascination with Waverly and her sisters, Nicole was a beautiful Junior who was friends with Waverly and her other sister Wynonna. Charming and sweet, but able to hold her own against Wynonna’s sass, Nicole was the reason that Waverly had first started questioning how straight she really was.

Not that Nicole knew any of this, though. Sure, they had a slightly flirtatious relationship which Wynonna seemed completely oblivious to, but nothing had ever really happened. Biting her lip, Waverly checked over her shoulder to make sure Chrissy was still asleep before putting the knife with Bobo’s name back on the floor and tucking the one bearing Nicole’s name carefully into her pocket.

\----------------

Wynonna rolled out of bed at noon, rubbing her eyes as she checked the clock. She’d slept through her first two classes of the day. Again. Sighing, she realised that she should probably at least make an effort to get to her afternoon class. She was just about to open the door when she noticed a flash of white on the floor. Her eyes lit up as she realised what the little plastic knife meant. It was Murder time, and this year, Wynonna was determined to win. She picked up the knife and read the name. _Xavier Dolls_. Grinning evilly to herself, Wynonna stuffed the knife into her pocket, her mind already scheming. Today just got a whole lot more interesting.

\----------------

Waverly was on guard as she walked across campus, looking out for anyone suspicious who might have her name on their knife. She reminded herself of the rules of Murder. The only times you couldn’t ‘kill’ your target was if they were in the canteen, their room, or if they were naked. Already she had seen two people walking around campus in nothing but a towel so they could drop it if confronted with their killer and become immune. It was a potentially embarrassing move that Waverly didn’t have the confidence to attempt.

“Hey Wave,” she heard from behind her, and she spun around, ready to throw a punch at whomever was there, only to be confronted with Wynonna.

Wynonna laughed openly at her. “Relax, sis, you’re not my target.”

“I don’t trust you,” Waverly countered, still refusing to lower her guard.

Wynonna rolled her eyes and dug her plastic knife out of her pocket. She offered it to Waverly, who recoiled away from it.

“I’m not an idiot, Wynonna, I know you’re gonna stick me with it the second I relax.”

“Look,” Wynonna pointed to the writing, “’Xavier Dolls’, not ‘Waverly Earp’. You’re safe.”

“Okay,” Waverly finally dropped her fighting stance and puffed out a breath. “Can you blame me though? You might as well call this time of year paranoia season.”

“Truth,” Wynonna said. “Who’s your target, by the way?”

“Nicole,” Waverly replied, trying to hide a smile.

“Nice. She’s good at this game though, she does study Criminology after all so it’s not going to be easy,” Wynonna warned her. “Our Freshman year she almost won the whole damn thing; took everyone by surprise.”

“But it’s not like I’m some random,” Waverly reasoned, “Nicole knows me so she’s gonna be less wary and I’m gonna have more opportunities to get her.”

Wynonna laughed. “Cute. Just make sure you have a good poker face or she’s gonna take one look at you and run for the hills. And, considering she runs cross country for the team amongst other sports, not to mention the fact that her legs are like, twice as long as yours… let’s just say I don’t fancy your chances of catching her.”

And with those parting words and a little wave, Wynonna walked away, a spring in her step that was only present at Murder time.

\----------------

Doc frowned as he saw the name on the knife shoved under his door. His roommate had already left the room and had no doubt rejected this name out of fear alone. Either that, or fate was a colossal dick.

_Wynonna Earp._

Doc cursed whichever deity was up there listening. Out of everyone in the whole damn college, he just had to draw the one person who would be impossible to ‘kill’. Wynonna was just too good at this game. More than that, she revelled in the cat and mouse mentality of the challenge. He’d heard it said that if Wynonna put as much effort into her studies as she did with Murder, she’d be top of her class.

Doc wondered idly where the knife bearing his name had ended up, and if the owner would catch up to him before he had a chance to take Wynonna out of the game.

\----------------

 _Chrissy Nedley_. Dolls read the name on his knife. Wynonna’s sister’s roommate. He grinned. Getting close to her should be easy enough; he just had to wait for the perfect opportunity to strike. Slipping the knife up his sleeve so he would have easy access to it, he opened his door and stepped out into the hall, noting that the lightbulbs had been unscrewed to make it harder to see. Smart tactics, he noted proudly. Yep, whoever had been unlucky enough to receive his name would have their work cut out for them.

\----------------

The first person Nicole ran into that day was Willa Earp. Groaning inwardly, she mustered a small smile for the eldest of the Earp sisters.

“Hey, Willa,” she greeted, and was met with a blank stare, “having a fun hunt?”

Willa frowned in confusion, her disinterest in talking to Nicole evident. “What?”

“Y’know, it’s the season of ‘murder’,” Nicole said, and Willa realised what she was talking about.

“Oh, that,” she said, “Not really; this game’s a bit stupid, don’t you think?”

“Depends on who you get,” Nicole replied easily, hoping to spot any clues as to Willa’s target.

Willa simply rolled her eyes. “Cut the crap, Haught, I don’t have you or any of your friends. I just got some rando named Pete.”

“Right…” Nicole didn’t really know how to continue the conversation, so she just nodded awkwardly as Willa brushed past her and went on her way. So rude, that one. Nicole didn’t understand how she could be related to two of the best people she’d ever met. Willa was the furthest thing from Wynonna and especially Waverly, and Nicole just didn’t get it.

Shaking her head, Nicole glanced around her to make sure she was alone in the hallway before getting the plastic knife out of her pocket.

“ _Champ Hardy_ ,” she read aloud, “revenge is gonna be so sweet.”

\----------------

Waverly breathed a sigh of relief as she entered the canteen that evening. She was safe from attack here. She bought some food and sat down at a table with Wynonna, Doc and Dolls.

“Anyone been successful yet?” she asked, and all three of them shook their heads. “Yeah, me neither,” Waverly smiled.

“Guess what, losers,” Chrissy came swanning over, waving two knives above her head. “I killed mine!”

“Nice one, dude,” Wynonna reached out her hand for a high-five. “You gonna tell us who you had?”

“One Bobo del Rey,” Chrissy replied smugly as she sat down opposite Waverly. “He hadn’t got his target yet so that one’s mine now.”

“Who is it?” Waverly asked.

“Steph,” Chrissy said smoothly, “Payback’s a bitch and so am I.”

“Oh yeah, Steph was the one who told Wynonna she needed a butt-lift,” Waverly recalled, giggling at the face Wynonna pulled.

“And the one who broke off ties with all of us when she found out we were friends with Nicole just cause she’s gay,” Chrissy said.

“I heard my name mentioned, hope you guys aren’t cussing me out behind my back,” Nicole laughed as she joined the group and set down her tray next to Waverly.

“Nah, it was Steph we were cussing out, don’t get your panties in a twist,” Wynonna said as Nicole sat down.

“Boyshorts,” Nicole corrected, and Waverly’s mind blanked, “Get it right, Wynonna.”

“Can we leave underwear out of this, please?” Dolls piped up. “I’m trying to eat.”

“Hey, Wave,” Nicole whispered, and Waverly turned her head, noticing with a jolt how close their faces were, “guess who I got for Murder.”

“Me?” Waverly asked dryly. It would be just her luck if they were each other’s targets.

“Nope. I got Champ,” Nicole grinned wickedly, and Waverly smiled at the thought of her douchebag ex-boyfriend being Nicole’s target.

“Stab him once for me,” Waverly joked, and Nicole winked at her.

“You got it, Wave.”

Waverly blushed slightly, and turned her attention back towards the group, not missing Chrissy’s smirk at her. Waverly shook her head almost imperceptibly. _What?_ Chrissy simply raised her eyebrows and went back to her dinner.

\----------------

Dolls excused himself early from dinner. Besides the fact that he needed to get a headstart on Chrissy so he could ‘kill’ her, the conversation between Nicole and Waverly was starting to get a little too adorable for his cynical ears. When he left, Nicole was trying to coax the name of Waverly’s target out of her, turning on the full Haught charm while Waverly stammered through excuses of ‘ultimate secrecy’. Grinning to himself, he knew Waverly wouldn’t be able to resist for long before Nicole got the name out of her.

Dolls walked back to the corridor where Waverly and Chrissy’s room was located and unscrewed a few of the lightbulbs. While this trick was good for defence, it also served as a nice cloaking for anyone lying in wait. He had been sure to wear dark clothing and as long as he kept still, Dolls was pretty confident he wouldn’t be seen.

After about ten minutes he heard footsteps approaching. The rhythm faltered as the owner undoubtedly noticed the darkness ahead, and then proceeded at a slower pace. When Dolls knew he was within striking distance he slipped the plastic knife from his pocket and lunged at his target.

Next thing Dolls knew, he was flat on his back with a stinging pain on the right side of his face. A light shone on his face and the voice of Waverly Earp reached his ears.

“Dolls? Oh my God, are you okay?” She gasped, reaching down to help him up before remembering the game and kicking the knife out of his hand. “Not that easy to kill, am I?”

“Wasn’t… you,” Dolls wheezed. “Chrissy…”

“Wait, your target is Chrissy?” Waverly asked. She shone her phone on the knife and saw the writing on it. “Huh. Oh, shit, Dolls I’m so sorry I hit you, I was just defending myself and-“

“Waverly, it’s okay,” Dolls said, the pain already receding as he staggered to his feet, “that punch was totally called for. Nice left hook, by the way.”

“Thanks,” Waverly smiled, though it turned to a frown as she studied Dolls’ face. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Fine,” Dolls said, “I’ve got a thick skull anyway, don’t you worry about me.”

“Well, if you’re sure,” Waverly said, still not completely satisfied. “I know you’ll be staking out the door waiting for Chrissy so if you need anything just shout.”

“I will, thanks Waverly,” Dolls said, smiling as Waverly unlocked her door and ducked inside.

\----------------

With Dolls and Waverly already having left, and Chrissy being the latest to retire to her room, Doc was stuck watching Nicole and Wynonna bicker about something or other, while he wondered how in hell he was meant to get Wynonna. Sure, he was fast, but he knew Wynonna wouldn’t trust anyone enough to let them get close to her outside of the walls of her bedroom and the canteen. At least he had a good poker face, unlike Waverly.

It had been clear to Doc that Waverly’s target was one of the group, given her refusal to say who it was, and with Wynonna out of the reckoning for obvious reasons, it had to be one of the remaining four. He briefly toyed with the idea of he himself being Waverly’s mark, but he dismissed that pretty quickly. Waverly hadn’t spared him a second glance at dinner, and she wasn’t sly enough to play it that cool. It probably wasn’t Chrissy either; otherwise Waverly would’ve already ‘killed’ her this morning, or waited until Chrissy left to go back to their room. They did live together after all, and Waverly was too intelligent to let opportunities like that pass her by. No, so that left either Dolls or Nicole as Waverly’s intended ‘kill’.

Doc was a bit stuck on that. On one hand, she had been very jumpy at Nicole’s proximity, and had done a lot of blushing around her, but that wasn’t anything new. Waverly’s crush could be seen for miles, although Wynonna somehow appeared to remain oblivious. It was only a matter of time before something happened between them, and Doc idly wondered if starting a betting pool would be considered immoral or not.

On the other hand, Waverly had left not too long after Dolls, so she might have followed him in order to take him out. He would need to ponder this for a while.

Doc was drawn his thoughts by Nicole excitedly slapping Wynonna on the arm mid-sentence.

“Champ’s leaving,” she whispered, “I gotta go stab him.”

“I always hoped someone would,” Wynonna responded dryly, and Nicole flashed a smile at them both before stealthily following Champ out of the room.

Wynonna turned her attention to Doc.

“I love this game,” she said happily, “I can’t wait to find out the sucker that’s gotten my name!”

Doc smiled. “Well, I’m sure they are positively crapping their pants.”

“Ooh, I hope so,” Wynonna grinned. “What’s your plan to get your mark?”

“Honestly, I have no idea,” Doc replied truthfully. “What about you?”

“Can you keep a secret?” Wynonna asked. At Doc’s nod, she continued, “I’ve got Dolls, so I’m just gonna distract him and then strike.”

“And how do you propose doing that?” Doc asked. Guess that solved the mystery of Waverly’s target.

“Easy,” Wynonna smirked, opening her jacket and nodding down. “Boobs.”

\----------------

When Waverly heard Chrissy’s yelp and cry of “ _Really_ , Dolls?!” she smiled around her toothbrush.

\----------------

Tracking Champ wasn’t hard for Nicole, his ridiculous cowboy boots and lack of grace made a racket as he sauntered down the halls, Nicole following swiftly with light footsteps. She shook her head. This was going to be too easy.

Champ stopped to talk to a friend, and Nicole made her move. Gliding by with her arms folded, plastic knife concealed, she poked Champ in the side and then stopped and whirled around, victorious.

“Got you, Champ Hardy!” She exclaimed, holding the knife in the air. Champ just looked confused.

“I didn’t feel anything,” he protested.

Nicole rolled her eyes. She knew the boy was thick-skinned, but this was ridiculous. When Champ didn’t run, she carefully poked him between the eyes. _That one’s for Waverly_ , she thought.

“Now you’re definitely dead,” she told him, and he shrugged, handing over his knife. “You didn’t get your target?” She asked, and Champ shook his head and walked off with his buddy. “Loser,” she muttered under her breath.

Her face broke out into a smirk as she saw the name written on the knife. Sometimes life was just too good to her.

 _Willa Earp_.

\----------------

The next morning, Chrissy confessed to Waverly that she had lied the previous night, and that she had been her next target. Waverly silently thanked God for Dolls, ‘cause she would’ve probably been a goner otherwise. Although that meant she would have to watch out for Dolls, given that she was now his mark.

“Now that I’m out of the game, can I know who your target is?” Chrissy asked.

“Nicole,” Waverly said, and Chrissy clapped her hands in excitement.

“This is brilliant,” Chrissy said, “This’ll be the perfect opportunity!”

“To do what?”

“To make a move, of course!”

“Woah,” Waverly said, putting her hands up defensively, “what makes you think I would want to… make a move?”

Chrissy rolled her eyes and groaned out loud. “Waves, are you kidding me? The world and their uncle knows you’ve got it bad for Nicole Haughtpants.”

“What?” Waverly asked weakly.

“Come on, Waverly,” Chrissy’s voice was gentle now, “When I met you at the beginning of Freshman year you were dating that asshole, Champ. Then Wynonna introduced us to Nicole and it was like he didn’t exist. And I know the official reason you broke up with him was because he was cheating on you, but it would take an idiot not to see that Nicole, whether she knew it or not, was also a major part in you growing some ovaries and kicking him to the curb.”

“Sorry, did you just say ‘growing some ovaries’?” Waverly said.

“Yes, now don’t change the subject,” Chrissy said. “Honey, believe me when I say there is no way in hell that girl doesn’t like you back.”

“You think?”

“Absolutely. Now go kiss her!”

“But what about the Murder game?” Waverly asked.

“Oh, yeah. Kill her first, then kiss her!” Chrissy corrected herself.

“Without context that doesn’t sound as appealing,” Waverly joked as she picked up her bag and made her way towards the door.

“All in the name of Murder,” Chrissy laughed. “Go get your girl.”

\----------------

When Doc passed Nicole that morning on the way back from breakfast, he thought maybe the whole situation would be more fun if Nicole had a heads-up.

“You’re Waverly’s target, Haught,” he said to her as they passed. Nicole whirled around.

“Seriously?”

Doc nodded. “I am almost certain.”

“Awesome,” Nicole said, changing direction to go back the way she came. “Screw breakfast, I’ve got a plan!”

\----------------

Wynonna strutted the halls of the university in her very carefully chosen outfit, which may or may not have included her tightest pair of jeans and a low cut top that made her boobs look amazing, in her opinion anyway. She knew that Dolls would be just finishing breakfast at this time; he usually ate at the same time as Doc, so Wynonna had actually gotten out of bed in time to meet him on her way back. Plastic knife tucked safely into her back pocket, she smiled when she saw Dolls heading her way.

“Hey, Dolls,” she greeted him. He stopped, looking surprised to see her this early, and then did a double-take as he processed what she was wearing. He cleared his throat and resolutely looked her in the eyes. _Such a gentleman_ , Wynonna thought, _pity it won’t save him_.

“What’re you doing up at this ungodly hour, Earp?” He teased her good-naturedly.

Wynonna shrugged. “Guess I just woke up early for once.”

“Uh-huh,” Dolls narrowed his eyes. There was a moment where nothing happened, and then everything happened all at once. Wynonna slowly and casually reached around to her back pocket, and Dolls bolted.

“Son of a bitch!” Wynonna cursed, setting off in pursuit. She was caught; if she didn’t ‘kill’ Dolls now, the guy would never let her within ten feet of him until the game was over. Dolls was fast, but he was predictable. Wynonna knew he would run to the sanctuary of the canteen, and what Dolls didn’t know was that she knew a shortcut.

\----------------

Waverly was ready.

She had spent the last fifteen minutes walking around campus psyching herself up whilst looking for Nicole. She was missing class, but for once, she didn’t care.

She finally saw the flash of red hair in a deserted hallway and noted that, from behind, Nicole seemed to be wearing a purple sundress. She sped up her pace, her heart hammering in her chest as she gripped the damn plastic knife like a lifeline.

When Waverly was about five paces away, Nicole hesitated, then spun around to face her. Her eyes widened and Waverly only just had time to wonder how she _knew_ before Nicole was ripping the sundress – no, the _towel_ – from her body and dropping it to the floor.

Waverly stopped in her tracks and her jaw dropped. The knife bearing Nicole’s name clattered uselessly to the floor as Waverly gaped at the sight of the naked girl, her crush, her… _Nicole_ standing there with a triumphant grin on her face.

“Can’t kill me, Wave,” she said, although her voice cracked on Waverly’s name. “Them’s the rules, remember?”

“I… um,” Waverly searched desperately for some words, _any_ words, and forced her eyes up to meet Nicole’s. “Well played?”

And with that, she hastily picked up the knife and ran.

\----------------

Dolls was within striking distance of the canteen when he was tackled to the ground and stabbed repeatedly with a cheap little plastic utensil wielded by a cackling Wynonna Earp.

“Gotcha!” She crowed gleefully, and Dolls sighed. At least he got Chrissy before being beaten.

“Are you done stabbing me?”

“Nope.”

\----------------

“She was impervious,” Was the first thing out of Waverly’s mouth when she entered her and Chrissy’s shared room.

“What, like she was in the canteen or something?” Chrissy asked. “You could’ve just waited for her to leave.”

“No, Chrissy, she was out in the open,” Waverly groaned, flopping down on her bed. “She dropped her damn towel.”

There was a moment’s silence before Chrissy burst into raucous laughter.

“Oh my God,” she gasped, clutching her sides, “I knew she was confident but I never knew she was _that_ confident!” She paused before asking, “How did she look?”

Waverly pulled a pillow over her face and muffled a scream.

“That good, huh?” Chrissy commented. “Seems like she lives up to her last name.” She heard a noise coming from under the pillow. “Can’t hear you, Waves.”

Waverly removed the pillow. “I ran,” she repeated. “I said ‘well played’ and then I ran away.”

Chrissy gave a low whistle. “You might want to talk to her before she gets the wrong idea and thinks she’s scared you off.”

“I know, I know,” Waverly said, pulling out her phone. “I just panicked.”

“Understandable.”

\----------------

Nicole was pacing back and forth in her room when her phone buzzed on her bed. Running a hand through her hair, she picked it up. Her heart leapt into her throat when she saw she had a text from Waverly.

**Waverly (9:14 a.m): Where are you? Can we talk?**

Hands shaking, Nicole typed out a reply.

**Nicole (9:15 a.m): Of course, I’m in my room.**

**Nicole (9:15 a.m): Fully clothed.**

**Nicole (9:15 a.m): Sorry.**

She threw her phone down on the bed before she could send any more messages and ran a hand through her hair again, a nervous habit. She couldn’t help but wonder if her stunt with the towel earlier had just cost her friendship with Waverly. Maybe she had misread the whole situation. Maybe Waverly wasn’t into her after all.

Nicole heard a knock on her door. Taking a deep breath, she walked over and opened it.

\----------------

Seeing Dolls sprawled on the floor with Wynonna gleefully poking him with a plastic knife would be an entertaining sight whatever the situation, but now it gave him the opportunity to take Wynonna out while she was distracted. Slipping the knife from his pocket, Doc casually walked closer to the pair, before a jab in his side caught him unawares. Looking to the side, he saw Willa Earp smirking at him and holding up a knife that bore his name.

“Looks like you’re dead,” she commented airily, and Doc, for the umpteenth time in his life, mentally cursed the Earp sisters.

\----------------

“Hi,” Waverly said, having not thought further ahead than a simple greeting when she had turned up at Nicole’s door.

“Waverly, I am so sorry,” Nicole rushed out, “I shouldn’t have done that; you clearly weren’t comfortable in that situation and I just don’t want it to ruin us, even though there’s not really an ‘us’ I just thought that maybe – I guess not but I just wanted you to know that I’m sorry and it won’t happen again-“

Nicole was cut off as Waverly surged forwards and kissed her. Nicole’s hands landed on her waist as Waverly cupped her face, intent on kissing Nicole until she ran out of air. She tangled her fingers in Nicole’s hair as she sucked on her bottom lip, drawing a moan from the other girl. Unable to stop a whimper of her own escaping, Waverly bit down gently on Nicole’s lip, and her mouth opened, allowing her to eagerly slip her tongue into Nicole’s mouth.

Eventually Nicole broke the kiss and leaned her forehead against Waverly’s. “What was that?” She asked breathlessly.

“That was my way of saying you haven’t ruined anything,” Waverly whispered, not daring to open her eyes, “and that maybe I want it to happen again.”

“So I didn’t scare you?” Nicole asked.

“No, just took me by surprise,” Waverly said, “Plus I think I may have spontaneously combusted if I stayed there any longer without either jumping you or running away.”

“Well, you’ve done both now,” Nicole pointed out, and Waverly puffed out a laugh against her cheek before drawing their lips together once more.

The kiss grew heated quickly, and Nicole groaned as Waverly tugged on her sweater, pulling her forwards into the hallway. Waverly ghosted one hand under the edge of her sweater and Nicole pushed herself even closer.

“And another thing,” Waverly gasped against Nicole’s mouth. She ran the plastic knife that she had grabbed out of her back pocket down Nicole’s cheek. “You’re dead.”

Nicole opened her eyes and gasped indignantly. “Waverly Earp, haven’t you already heard the one about the dead lesbian?”

“Sorry,” Waverly said, not very sorry at all.

Nicole simply shook her head and kissed her again.

\----------------

Dolls always thought it was funny that someone as smart as Wynonna could be so dense. When Waverly and Nicole had announced their relationship at dinner a week later, the only person surprised had been Wynonna.

“You seriously didn’t see this coming?” Chrissy asked her incredulously, as the six of them walked back to their rooms.

Wynonna shook her head. “How could I? They must’ve been so subtle about it…”

“ _What?!_ ” Had been the general chorus of responses, Waverly and Nicole included.

“They’ve been eye-fucking for months…” Chrissy trailed off.

“I had more important things to be paying attention to,” Wynonna protested, “like winning Murder.”

“You still haven’t won yet,” Waverly reminded her. “A few of us are still in the game.”

After taking out Nicole, Waverly had taken great pleasure in catching Willa unawares and adding another tally to her Murder ‘kill’ list, before Nicole swooped in and gave her girlfriend a congratulatory kiss which left Willa ready to explode.

“Actually, there’s only two of us,” Wynonna said, and touched her knife to Waverly’s throat before her younger sister could even get hers out of her back pocket.

“And that’s all she wrote!” Wynonna whooped as Waverly stomped her foot in defeat. “I am the champion of murdering people!”

“Might wanna lower your voice,” Nicole said, rolling her eyes.

Wynonna childishly stuck her tongue out at Nicole. “I didn’t even have to go against you, Haught, cause all it took was a girl kissing you and you were hopeless. If I’d have known that I would’ve kissed you last year when you killed me!”

“Hey!” Waverly said indignantly, lacing her fingers with Nicole’s. “Back off.”

“Whatever,” Wynonna said, “See you losers around, I’m off to claim my prize!”

She grabbed Waverly’s knife and ran off in the direction of the Office.

“It’s just a bottle of vodka, Wynonna,” Waverly yelled after her, Nicole kissing the top of her head. “You probably already had one of those for breakfast!”


End file.
